i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize