I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
