Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
