is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
