i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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