Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
