i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
