im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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