I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I think my moral compass just broke
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
