dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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