WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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