mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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