VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
