I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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