Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
