dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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