I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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