I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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