I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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