Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
