First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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