You work out of a Hotel?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
