There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
