Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
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