His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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