Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Randomize
