Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
My nipple is on Facebook.
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
