so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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