Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I can't turn off my feet"
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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