he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
