you thought your balls were fighting each other...
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
