I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
