its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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