I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
