How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Dear god my vagina.
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