You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Its about making memories worth repressing
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize