a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
