I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
