matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
