He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
