he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Randomize