You just made me feel so damn special
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
