i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
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