Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
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