so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize