maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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