somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
