the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
