im gay
i know
yea but for you.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize