we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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